whichiest | PENANCE IC INBOX

(This is exactly why he loves humanity so damn much.

His cheek stings, but ultimately, it has seen worse. Instead of looking dismayed, upset, irritated, or any negative emotion that could cross her mind as being his, he's just so damned amused. Izaya laughs in a good mood, gently resting a hand on where she hits while the other wipes down a tear that forms on his eye.

Gold. This is just gold.)

It's fine, Bella-chan! You really are surprising, huh?

[He's laughing and saying it's okay, even smiling, but her face burns in shame. Somehow, it's worse that he isn't mad. He should be!]

I...I just...

[Honestly, she isn't sure what to say.]

You really startled me, otherwise I'd never...

(He'd never be mad at such a thing. In fact, he's even more delighted than if she had kissed him. It's more surprising and exciting like this, when he doesn't know what to expect!)

Again, Bella-chan, it's okay. I won't try again.

[Belladonna takes a deep breath and nods slowly, willing her heart to calm its frantic dancing. For a long moment she just stands there, uncertain, but feels like she can't simply leave this one as it is. Her impulse, of course, starts with apologizing again, but that much she manages to swallow.]

If I was ever misleading in my intentions, I'm sorry. I really treasure our relationship as it is, with you as my mentor.

No, no, Bella-chan. I just wanted to see.

(Whatever the fuck that means, that is. Well, he's probably well enough to stand up, stretch with an acceptable amount of world spinning before he takes his tea into his hands again.)

[She doesn't, in fact, have any idea what that means! And unable to help herself, she steps closer again to make sure she can help him out in case he loses his footing. Glad for the opportunity to move on from...whatever it was that just happens, she manages a rushed:]

How's your tea? Still hot?

Mhm? It's fine.

(And he'll take a final sip, delicately setting the cup back to its coaster and giving a little sigh.

Mhm. :) )

I guess I've made it weird, hm? I should probably be on my way.

[The statement flashes surprise across her sweet face, and she quickly shakes her head, reaching out to put her hands in his shoulders.]

Oh, no, of course not! You really oughtn't be alone right now!

I really don't think they're coming to finish the job! Trust me, if that monster wanted me dead, he'd do it in the snap of a finger.

(And tenderly, a hand goes to touch hers, quietly caressing the back of it.)

[Her heart aches with guilt. He's just leaving because of what she did, what she said. He promised her it was okay, but...

She chews on her lower lip.]

I don't want you to go, yet. Not right after what just happened--I can't stand leaving things like this.

Leaving things like what? I told you, it was fine, totally fine.

(And, as usual, it works. God, it's scary how gullible she is, and just how easy he finds it to capitalize on it.)

I know you did, but it isn't fine! I feel just...just awful! I don't want you to think that you strained anything when it was my fault!

[It wasn't her fault at all, of course, but she can't stop herself.]

(He's not rushing to deny it. Not when it worked, more or less, as he has planned, and his hands drop to his hips.

Honestly? This is even better than his original plan.)

And now, Bella-chan? What is it that you think would make you feel better?

[Honestly? She has no idea. All she knows is that she wants to go back to the way that things were before he leaned in. Even before he got injured, perhaps. She takes a breath.]

I wish I knew what you were thinking.

[What he must really be thinking, because she doesn't believe this is something to so easily wash off. How could it be? Removing her hands from his shoulders, she carefully takes his hands and holds them in hers, resolute as she goes through her own thoughts. Past her instincts, past her selfish longings, to try and look at the bigger picture.

The only thing we can do is take our chances and hold on dear to what we have here and not let go.

What if he had died, today? Would he truly have been revived? Would he have disappeared?

Belladonna takes a deep breath before speaking again.]

I have a question, first. The people we meet here, and the actions we take, do you think they would, or should, impact our potential futures back home?

(You and literally everyone, Bella. That's how Izaya operates. He makes others act when Izaya sets the ground for disaster. If he just told her what he was thinking, wouldn't that miss the purpose?

Well. At least he did her a half-truth. He wanted to see, and he did see something, alright.

Izaya allows his hands to be taken, an eyebrow raising in curiosity to her line of questioning.)

I myself don't think this place bears any importance if we do go home, only if we do go to Heaven... Which again, defies the purpose of Hell, doesn't it? I'm sure that if I do go back home, which I find unlikely, I'll continue the same as I have ever been. I don't think it should change our lives to the point of growth back at home, after all, there are several things that just happen to be core personality traits that I believe shouldn't be messed with. If someone, for instance, knows for a fact that an after-life exists, wouldn't that completely change their personality if they're completely frightened about it? They won't be the same person, after all.

Alright.

[It's not necessarily the sort of answer she was looking for, but it'll do. It's enough, and ultimately gives her what she needs even if it's a typically-Izaya monologue.]

I've been doing a bit of thinking, just recently, and I believe I've been looking at my time here the wrong way. And the way that I've been behaving, just now...it isn't practical at all, is it?

[Not for someone determined to become evil, especially. She's limiting herself, closing doors that would be better left open.]

Okay. What would make me feel better, you asked. I think I've decided.

[But it isn't an easy decision, and she's never been an altogether impulsive person in most cases, a few special cases notwithstanding. And, of course, no matter how much she's hyping herself up, this is quite at odds with her better judgment.

The thing is, she can't think of anything else to do here, and beyond that, wants so desperately to push herself to embracing the sort of behaviors that would be lauded in a setting like this one.

So, before she can talk herself out of it or shy away, she leans in, all the way, and kisses him quickly.

Obviously, she's never kissed anyone before, so, really, she has no idea what she's doing, and that terrifies her tremendously.]

(He listens, of course. There's that chilling smile again on his lips, one that surfaces because he knows exactly what might have gotten into her mind. Nakura is not here, of course, but Izaya has bought the name from him and he'll absolutely use it to paint the most pathetic, woeful bitch on Earth when he's not using it to ruin the man's life. What was the last sob story he crafted again?

Oh. Yes. The story of a poor man whose girlfriend got pregnant from his dad. Worked wonders for the last girl he mindfucked. Once again, Nakura strikes!

Entertaining, entertaining, entertaining! Seeing her just shed her former beliefs like that, so easily, so fast! All it took was a few pushes, a few words from a single conversation! God, it's so alluring that it makes him sick on his stomach, he's nearly shaking with excitement when soft, chaste lips touch his.

Izaya takes one of his hands back, only to take it to her delineated waist in the little time he had before lips part and his grin grows.

Bingo. He'll slowly separate, allowing his forehead to rest against hers.)

Worth it, Bella-chan?

Edited 2021-05-23 06:19 (UTC)

[Was it worth it? A simple, yet incredibly loaded question. Yes? No? She feels incredibly foolish and silly...but somehow, that isn't the worst way to feel in that moment. Especially when the closeness feels so nice, and his voice is like all the most beautifully dark and decadent things she can think of. Her face is so hot.

A bubble of laughter rises in her throat; honestly, she can hardly believe what she just did. This entire day has been a whirlwind that doesn't seem to want to stop anytime soon.]

Yes, I think it was.

[Because of all the complicated thoughts and emotions spinning inside of her, regret isn't one of them.]

(Izaya is absolutely overjoyed. What a day it has been, being nearly killed, slapped across the face, and kissed. This is exactly why he can't ever be somewhere without people, he just cannot imagine all the things that are happening that don't involve him right under his nose, and it thrills him.

It just propels him.

With a gentle kiss to cheek, Izaya spells away for the time being.)

I'm glad to hear.

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1/2

I don't have any appropriate emotes!!!!

cw just izaya being a triggery asshole

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I'm calling this a wrap, but,